Wednesday, December 9, 2009

The giant’s hat

Jim Wittenberg


The giant’s hat fell on my house. I’m not sure if it accidentally dropped off his head or if he intentionally threw it away, but it covered my house entirely. I didn’t know what happened. Suddenly it was dark inside the house, and when I looked it was dark outside also. I had no idea what to do, and since none of my favorite tv shows was on I went to bed. Twelve hours later I woke up, looked out the window, and it was still dark.

I called the police and asked if they knew why the sky had gone black. They didn’t know what I was talking about since the sky above the police station was clear and blue. They thought I was crazy and hung up on me. I called them again but they had my number blocked. Then I called the mayor but she was in a meeting, and since I wasn’t anyone important her receptionist wouldn’t forward the message. Next I called the fire department, and since I lied to them and told them my cat was stuck in the tree they came to my house and discovered it was hidden beneath the giant’s hat. They were angry because I had phoned in a false alarm, and they decided to leave the hat where it was.

It’s been three days since the giant’s hat fell on my house. I’ve called the television and radio news people, but they think it’s a hoax. My eyes are getting accustomed to the darkness, and I’ve discovered that I can talk like Donald Duck. There still aren’t any good tv programs, and I’ve decided that I’m stupid because my only pleasure is scratching myself.

I hope the giant begins looking for his hat.


Born in 1956 in Placetas, Cuba, Jim Wittenberg was raised in Sacramento, California, USA, where he currently lives with his teenage daughter. He also has one son, one daughter-in-law and two grandchildren. Jim began writing stories and poetry as a teenager.

"The giant's hat"was first posted on The New Absurdist website hosted by polycarp kusch.

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